Back to Basic, Back to Blogging

In 2010 I decided that one of the things I wanted to include as a New Year's resolution was to blog more, and I did. However, after Eli was born I felt a need to get back to basics on many levels...hmm, I wonder why. Having a new baby, I imagine, can do that for you. Another thing that has been on my mind is our relationships with each of the boys' birth moms. This blog was started, in part, for them, but I was feeling the need to reach out to them more, so we have made that effort. We haven't been successful on all fronts, but I am definitely pleased with where our relationship with Andrea, Gabriel's birth mom, has progressed to. On August 6^th, two days before Gabe's 3^rd birthday, we saw Andrea and her mother Tammy for the first time since Gabriel was born. It was an awesome experience. I feel like we have grown much closer. We have called, we have messaged through Facebook, we talked through Skype on Christmas, and I am so excited to say that we have another trip planned in the next couple weeks to go see her and more of her extended family. Gabriel is so excited! He keeps telling people "we have 16 more days (or however many it may be) til we go see my tummy mommy!". I love seeing how excited he is and feeling that excitement myself. I love that he knows her, that he tells people about her, and that he knows that she loves him. She will always be a part of us because she is a part of him, and she means so much to us. I hope to develop a closer relationship with Eli's birth mom in the future. Even though we are not in contact with her now, she is always in our thoughts and prayers, and we love her.

The boys are wonderful. I love being at home with them! I love my husband, who works hard, so that I can be at home, and who wants me there as much as I want to be there. Gabriel learns so quickly. He is learning to identify his numbers and letters, and even writing a little. He loves to color with markers, paint, and read books. He likes playing with cars, trains, and pretty much any toy with wheels or wings. He also likes to build things. We have recently had a friend come do some repairs around our house and he has let Gabriel watch as he works on things. Gabriel has been in heaven. He is such a smart kid and he loves to see how things work.

My Gabriel is so full of adventure

I love to see him happy

Elijah will be 18 months old and he is every bit as ornery. Whoever said the terrible twos start at 2 years old was lying. Still, he is also such a sweet heart. Even at this young an age you can tell that he loves his family. He wants to do everything his big brother does and he is almost as tall as Gabriel, so he tries a lot of what Gabriel does, which makes for a very nervous mommy sometimes. He still loves to cuddle. He also loves all things vehicular. He got a car that he can sit on for Christmas and he plays on it most of the day. He doesn't use words very much, I think because he has a big brother who does a lot of talking for him, and he seems to get his point across without talking. We have been working on getting him to talk to us lately and he is making a good deal of progress. He is so tall, and we expect by the time he is ready to be baptized that Eli will be as tall as Mark.

My beautiful Eli

I love this picture of my boys. They love each other so much and it makes us so happy!

It is amazing the amount of joy a happy family brings. Believe me, things are not perfect, but perfect is not really the point. It is definitely true that it is the little things that bring the greatest happiness.

Baby Brother!

It's a boy! He is beautiful and healthy and we are so grateful to have another baby. Everything has happened so fast that I think I am still a bit in shock. We had 17 days from when we found out we had been chosen by a birth mother to when our son was born. Elijah Daniel Leland entered the world on July 19th and it seems our world has changed yet again.

Mark and I traveled down to Huntington, West Virginia on Sunday evening, the 18th, as we had been told that Eli's birth mother would be induced Monday morning. We left Gabriel in the capable hands of our friends, Cortney and Greg. It was really hard being away from him for four days, and we couldn't have done it without them and the many family members who have helped in caring for him or driving back and forth to see us. On Monday we sat in the waiting room for many hours without almost any information. Because of some of the details of our birth mother's situation, the hospital staff were VERY uneasy about sharing any information even when they had signed releases. We finally were told around 3pm by the hospital Social Worker, who was amazing, that it was still going to be a while before the baby was born. She advised that we take a break from sitting in the waiting room, go back to our hotel, and do something to relax. We went back to the hotel and took a nap, which was just what we both needed as we hadn't gotten much sleep the night before.

A little after 5pm our case worker, Spencer, came to our hotel to let us know what was going on. While we were napping he had arrived at the hospital and had talked to our birth mom. That morning she had asked the hospital Social Worker what her rights were for keeping the baby. This is a totally normal reaction for a birth mom. Who wouldn't hesitate to give their baby to someone else to raise? Spencer, who is fabulous at working with birth moms without pressuring them to place, came to the hospital to talk to her, see how she was feeling, and help her to understand her options. Once she had the chance to talk with him she was able to better understand her options and come back to the conclusion that she was making the right choice for this baby to give him to us. She still wasn't sure if she wanted to meet us, and whether or not she wanted to share her last name with us. This would determine whether or not we would be able to spend any time with the baby before the relinquishment papers were signed. So, Monday was a very stressful day for all involved. Still, we knew that Heavenly Father would help Eli's birth mom to know what she needed to do and if we were meant to be the parents of this baby, he would help that to happen.

Some how we were able to sleep on Monday night. We got up the next morning, got ready to go, and sat and waited for some word as to what was going on. Finally, at about 10:15am, Spencer texted Mark and said that we should come to the hospital and that we would be able to see the baby. We quickly grabbed our wallets, phones, camera, and a few other things and drove the 5 minutes to the hospital. I think that was the moment I realized how grateful I was that Mark had insisted we spend more money to stay closer to the hospital in a nicer hotel. After extensive identity checking, we were put in an empty patient room while a nurse went to get the baby. It was only about a half hour from the time we got the text to when we finally got to meet Elijah, but it felt like forever. He was worth the wait. He was so tiny, but long. He has a ton of soft black hair and beautiful dark brown, almost black, eyes. He is beautiful. Unlike his brother, who was born C-section, Eli was a little beat up from delivery. He has a stork bite on his face, which was very bright, and he was very puffy. Still, we thought he was amazing. We were able to be with him for many hours that day in the privacy of that patient room. It was perfect.

Spencer also told us that Elijah's birth mom had decided that she did want to meet us. I met with her by myself first, then later that day, Mark also met her. Over the next few days I spent several hours with her, getting to know her and talking about Eli. She felt that it was very important that we, as mothers, get to know each other and bond. One of the many ways we knew that this baby is meant to be a part of our family was how he was named. As many of you know, Gabriel has two middle names. One was given to him from his birth mom and one from us. Eli's birth mom asked if we would be willing to give him the middle name of Leland, but she didn't think it went well with Elijah, so she suggested that we could give him another middle name as well. It was perfect. This solution went perfectly with what we had already done with Gabriel. I think it is a wonderful tradition that our birth moms have been able to give our sons a middle name and it just shows how Heavenly Father helps us see how right certain situations are. The second and third day we spent with Elijah in the hospital they stuck us in the overflow nursery area. It was far from ideal or comfortable, but we were with Eli and it was a little amusing.

I will forever be grateful for the experience of spending time with Eli's birth mom. She told me toward the end of our time there that she was very grateful that she chose to meet us and that this is what finally helped her to know that she was doing the right thing. She told us that she came to understand that because she loves Eli, that giving him to us is the most selfless and loving thing she could do for him. We are so thankful for her. She is amazing, as is Gabriel's birth mom. We have great respect for them. While being able to take our babies home from the hospital is one of the most exciting and happy times of our lives, knowing that their birth moms are feeling so sad is very sad for us. It is truely a bitter sweet experience.

We were reunited with Gabriel that night, thanks to Mark's wonderful sister, Sarah, and it was so fun to see Gabriel meet his baby brother for the first time. He was excited and gentle and it was great! Sarah also brought my nephew, Collin, who stayed with me for several days after Mark and Sarah had to go back to Ohio. All together, I was in West Virginia for 18 days. By the end I was going a little crazy, but it was definately worth it. We now have our beautiful Elijah.

He is so completely different from Gabriel, except in his very fast growth. He was 6 pounds 13 ounces, and 20 inches (really 21, but he wouldn't cooperate) when he was born. At his 3 week check up he was already 9 pounds. He loves to cuddle especially with his mommy. He is definately a momma's boy. Gabriel was and is still very social. Even as a new born baby, he wanted to be able to see what was going on, so we had to hold him facing out. Gabriel was standing a lot of the time, by about 3 weeks old. He was a big daddy's boy. He loved his momma, but he still adores his daddy. They are best buds. Eli on the other hand is all about momma. He has attached to me so quickly and completely that it has surprised me a bit. I love being the person who can sooth him at all times. He is content to stare into someones eyes for a long time, and he is more interested in cuddling then in seeing what there is to see. We love both of our boys so much! They have each brought such unique and amazing things into our lives.

Elijah's statistics:
born July 19th at 7:43pm

6lbs, 13oz

20 inches

Happy Mother's Day to our Birth Mother

Happy Mother's day! I love being a mom. There is no doubt about it, this is what I was waiting and hoping for since I was a little girl. I have always wanted to be a mother. Almost two years ago, Mark and I found out about Gabriel's birth mother, Andrea. She was searching for the right family for the baby she was carrying, and she chose us. We have been beyond grateful for that choice ever since. Gabriel is a beautiful, unique, and amazing light in our lives. While Mark and I were happy in our marriage before he came to our family, he has brought a completely new and wonderful part to our lives that we could not have had otherwise. He has made our marriage stronger. He has helped us learn and grow and love even more. He is beauty in our lives.

As I was saying a prayer with Gabriel this morning, I thought of Andrea. Without her, I could not have been his mom. Andrea, you will forever be in our lives. We think of you everyday. We pray for you every night before Gabriel goes to bed. We have started to tell him about you and your family, who loved (and I'm sure still do love) him so much. I know you loved him and I try every day to give him what you wanted for him.

So, today I wanted to say to you, Gabriel's first mother-Happy Mother's Day! I am proud to share this day with you.

I love you

Tuesday evening we went out for dinner, because Mark hadn't eaten all day, and he decided he really wanted a steak. While we were at the restaurant I realized that I hadn't brought my cell phone with me and I had to go strait from there to the church for youth activity night. Mark offered to let me take his phone with me and I did. When I came home he told me that he and Gabriel had made me a gift on my phone. Here it is:

The "Ah Lala lu" or "I love you" at the end is my favorite. Mostly he says it when prompted, but every once in a while he just says it out of the blue. It makes my heart melt every time.

From the sicky sickos

I am so sick of being sick! I know I promised to post about Mark's time off awhile ago, but it seems I have been dealing with some type of infirmity or another for the past month. We had a wonderful time while he was off. We went to the Newport Aquarium with my mom and step-dad and had a wonderful time. We went at a leisurely pace the whole time and we all enjoyed the beautiful, scary, and strange that they had to offer. I think Gabriel's favorite area was the jelly fish, which he kept calling bubbles. We took some pictures, which I will publish as their own post.

For 24 hours of Mark's time off Gabriel went to him Mawmar's house (Sarah's mom) and Mommy and Daddy got to spend some much needed couple time. We firmly believe that it is important to keep our relationship strong now so when our children leave home (which eventually we hope they do) we will still love and like each other. While I love my son, the most important relationship in my life is my marriage. Mark continues to be my bestfriend. I love seeing him as a father. Seeing him in this role only strengthens my love for him. I couldn't ask for a better, more kind father for my children.

Mostly, we just spent time together, which was the point of Mark taking time off. It was exactly what I had hoped for.

Since then, I threw my back out and have had other sicknesses. Gabriel had an ear infection a couple of weeks ago, and then this week I took him back to the pediatrician due to an infection in his eyes. Getting a 20 month old to hold still while putting eye drops in their eyes is no easy task. He got this eye infection from a nasty cold, which he has now passed on to me. Within about 24 hours it went from a soar throat to a fever and loosing my voice. I have now passed it on to Mark in about 24 hours time. Thankfully, Mark doesn't seem to be as bad as I am and he has taken good care of us while we have been sick. I am grateful my husband is so willing to pick up the slack whenever I can't do my share, and without complaint too.

Our summer is already filling up with fun adventures. Mark's brother is getting married June 12th. We are going camping hopefully later in June, and I am planning on going to Palmyra, NY for youth conference in July. My best friend from college, Debbie, was planning on coming here from Utah in July with her family, but that trip has sadly been canceled. Still, it is going to be a fun summer with lots of family time. We are all excited and for now we are enjoying the beauty of spring. We hope you are all enjoying it where ever you may be as well.

Ohhh, I'm so excited!

Mark is taking time off! Back in January I suggested that Mark schedule some time off in March because there are not any holidays that he has off between New Year's Day and Memorial Day. So, starting this Friday we will have 6 days of relaxation and fun as a family. We are going to the Newport Aquarium and we might go to the Columbus Zoo. Mostly, we are just going to hang out at home and relax. We are all so excited! I think even Gabriel knows that something is coming. I'll post more about what we did with some pictures next week.

Other than that things are pretty much the same. Gabriel says a new word every day (which is not an exaggeration). He remains the most adorable, ornery little boy. When Mark is here they are pretty much inseparable, but no one;s kiss can heal like mommy's. I love being his mommy. So, until next week I hope you are all doing well and that you get to spend some quality time with those you love.

Best Friends

This is Gabriel's best friend E.






I babysit E and his older brother a few days a week. They live next door. Sometimes when I put Gabriel to bed and he is getting fussy, I say, "it's an E day tomorrow. You have to go to bed so he can come over in the morning" and he lays down and goes to sleep. When he saw them coming over the other day he got so excited. He was jumping up and down and squealing with delight. When I go get E up from a nap they see each other and they both start laughing and run over to each other. They love each other. E is almost exactly 6 months older then Gabe. They follow each other around playing together all day. When I come into the room where they are playing they look at me and run away, like they don't want me to interupt their conspiratorial behavior.








Yes, Gabriel is sitting on E's lap in that second picture.




Sometimes, when it is a non-babysitting day I think Gabriel thinks to himself, "I wish E was here". Don't get me wrong, Gabriel loves his mommy, but I think he gets a little bored when it is just the two of us and I am trying to get some house work done. Hopefully we will get to have some fun out of doors soon and he won't be quite so bored without his bestfriend.